One Possibility
One Possibility
FOURTH IN BEGINS WITH ONE SERIES
The One Day that has defined my life for over twenty-two years, creating the One Lie I believed was my real identity, drove me to protect against the One Fear of Shame.
Protecting against the fear of being found out was exhausting. The one thing I wanted to stop was the only thing I could find to comfort the fear. The cycle of addiction took me farther than I wanted to go in my life. It seemed to cost me everything I cherished.
I wanted to believe I could be changed. Freedom was something I wanted, but peace felt like a dream.
I held on to my secrets, living an identity for everyone to see, but I knew that my true identity was the one I kept hidden. The real Brett was in that hidden 3%.
The idea of loving my wife and my two young children openly, without any secrets, was something I deeply desired. However, I wondered how it could ever happen, as my life experiences had led me to believe it was impossible.
God had other plans to show me there was One Possibility for my life to be different—not just different, but transformed.
But how could He?
I already go to church, attend a men’s small group, tithe, occasionally read my Bible, pray, am nice to others, and believe Jesus is Lord.
If I do all these things and I haven’t been changed already, how could God change me?
His plan was shown to me in a series of events over a few weeks.
The first event was when a member of the small group shared his struggle with pornography and how he took extreme actions to ensure He stayed away from it while traveling. This shocked me.
My immediate thoughts after hearing this guy share his struggle were, “You are crazy!” How could he think people would still be his friends, let alone respect him? Will other people see my lies after he shared his? How can I avoid being exposed?
This fear led my walls of protection to go even higher!
A few months after hearing this “craziness.” Our associate pastor had a rare occasion to preach on a Sunday. I don’t recall the message, but as I sat with the congregation listening to his sermon, I was sure I was the source material for his message.
How did he know my struggles? I know he didn’t, but it felt as if he had been stalking me. The sermon cornered me into questioning everything I had done and then led me to consider the possibility that Jesus could forgive all of it.
I didn't realize at the time that, through this series of events, Jesus was answering my prayers.
Below are a few of the journal entries from my prayers three years before:
Lord, please forgive me for I have sinned. Break my heart and turn me from my sin for all of my days. Give me the strength to get help. - April 24th, 2001
Lord, please forgive me of my sins… I have fallen so far… Please help me before I destroy my life! –June 26th, 2001
Give me the strength and courage to admit my sins. I ask that you will find mercy on me when I do – July 31st, 2001
”He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God; Many will see and fear And will trust in the Lord.“ Psalms 40:3
Is Psalm 40:3 not just a nice saying? How could he change me without me first having to fix myself? How could He possibly love me despite all my filth? Is there a chance my life could really change?
Could this be the One Possibility that could change my life?
It sounded too good to be true!
Yet, His plans were already unfolding to address the prayers I had written down in my journal. The mere possibility that His love could be enough to save me captured my full attention.
However, I wasn't transformed by this initial possibility of change. Finding the life I had always desired and believed impossible would require one more step.
It would take one step of faith, One Decision, to change and define my life.
The transformation of your life through Jesus is not just a possibility; it is a certainty.
Interested in learning more about this certainty? Reach out to us, and let's explore the hope that this transformation can bring.
Contact us at info@changinglanes.org to discover how your life can be changed.
The One Day that has defined my life for over twenty-two years, creating the One Lie I believed was my real identity, drove me to protect against the One Fear of Shame.
Protecting against the fear of being found out was exhausting. The one thing I wanted to stop was the only thing I could find to comfort the fear. The cycle of addiction took me farther than I wanted to go in my life. It seemed to cost me everything I cherished.
I wanted to believe I could be changed. Freedom was something I wanted, but peace felt like a dream.
I held on to my secrets, living an identity for everyone to see, but I knew that my true identity was the one I kept hidden. The real Brett was in that hidden 3%.
The idea of loving my wife and my two young children openly, without any secrets, was something I deeply desired. However, I wondered how it could ever happen, as my life experiences had led me to believe it was impossible.
God had other plans to show me there was One Possibility for my life to be different—not just different, but transformed.
But how could He?
I already go to church, attend a men’s small group, tithe, occasionally read my Bible, pray, am nice to others, and believe Jesus is Lord.
If I do all these things and I haven’t been changed already, how could God change me?
His plan was shown to me in a series of events over a few weeks.
The first event was when a member of the small group shared his struggle with pornography and how he took extreme actions to ensure He stayed away from it while traveling. This shocked me.
My immediate thoughts after hearing this guy share his struggle were, “You are crazy!” How could he think people would still be his friends, let alone respect him? Will other people see my lies after he shared his? How can I avoid being exposed?
This fear led my walls of protection to go even higher!
A few months after hearing this “craziness.” Our associate pastor had a rare occasion to preach on a Sunday. I don’t recall the message, but as I sat with the congregation listening to his sermon, I was sure I was the source material for his message.
How did he know my struggles? I know he didn’t, but it felt as if he had been stalking me. The sermon cornered me into questioning everything I had done and then led me to consider the possibility that Jesus could forgive all of it.
I didn't realize at the time that, through this series of events, Jesus was answering my prayers.
Below are a few of the journal entries from my prayers three years before:
Lord, please forgive me for I have sinned. Break my heart and turn me from my sin for all of my days. Give me the strength to get help. - April 24th, 2001
Lord, please forgive me of my sins… I have fallen so far… Please help me before I destroy my life! –June 26th, 2001
Give me the strength and courage to admit my sins. I ask that you will find mercy on me when I do – July 31st, 2001
”He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God; Many will see and fear And will trust in the Lord.“ Psalms 40:3
Is Psalm 40:3 not just a nice saying? How could he change me without me first having to fix myself? How could He possibly love me despite all my filth? Is there a chance my life could really change?
Could this be the One Possibility that could change my life?
It sounded too good to be true!
Yet, His plans were already unfolding to address the prayers I had written down in my journal. The mere possibility that His love could be enough to save me captured my full attention.
However, I wasn't transformed by this initial possibility of change. Finding the life I had always desired and believed impossible would require one more step.
It would take one step of faith, One Decision, to change and define my life.
The transformation of your life through Jesus is not just a possibility; it is a certainty.
Interested in learning more about this certainty? Reach out to us, and let's explore the hope that this transformation can bring.
Contact us at info@changinglanes.org to discover how your life can be changed.
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2025
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A Spiritual Green ThumbThankfulness in Times of TrialOne New LifeOne StepOne DecisionOne PossibilityOne FearOne LieOne DayFurther Up. Further In.When TImes Are Good, Don’t Lose GroundBlessings From The FatherWill shame stop exploitation?New Life in ChristNew Life: A Beautiful MessWhen It’s Hard To Do What You Said you would doConviction vs. ActionNot By SightFinding Identity In The Deep EndRefuge In The StormCan I Really Change? One Guaranteed Way Inside“I Made It” A Tribute To Terry TurnerOne Decision. One Choice.Free IndeedI never knew that something that merely peaked my curiosity at the age of twelve, would turn into years of relentless shame and secrecy. Over the course of four years pornography had consumed more of my life than I ever intended to give it. I vividly remember one of my most desperate prayers to God when I was sixteen. With knots twisting in my stomach, and tears uncontrollably running down my face I said, “God, I can’t do this anymore.” It was in that moment He replied, “Jessica, you don’t have to.” If you are reading this, I don’t know where you are in life or the magnitude of the struggles that you face. What I do know, is that there is such a thing as freedom. For me, it was freedom from more than a pornography addiction. Lust, deception, shame, guilt, comparison, rejection, abandonment, and condemnation have all reared their heads in the years that followed that night when I was sixteen. At times I found myself asking, “When will this ever end?” Somehow, I fell under the impression that the surrender of one thing meant that things in this new relationship with God would inevitably be effortless afterward. Not only was I wrong, but I am glad I was wrong. John 8:36 reads, “So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” To this day, it is a verse that has brought me the greatest joy, and I want to tell you why. Jesus starts out this verse by saying “if the Son sets you free.” I couldn’t keep up with the facade that everything was okay, and that I didn’t have an addiction. Freedom came in the moment I said that I couldn’t do it anymore. It wasn’t ever going to be found in my own ability, and for that I am thankful. I am thankful that I can never be too proud of my own strength and resistance to sin. On my own I will miserably fail. Then later in the verse comes my favorite part: “free indeed.” For only six letters, indeed is a powerful word. According to Strong’s concordance, some definitions include “really, truly,” and “actually.” In other words, Jesus was saying that this freedom is without question. It’s not a distant, unattainable fantasy. It’s an undeniable reality that only He can make possible. So where does this leave you now? It leaves you with a choice. Regardless of where you consider yourself to be in this life, Jesus is the only way to lasting freedom. The lies that tell you that this is how it always must be are exactly that – lies. There is a life beyond addiction. Ten years ago, I found myself at that crossroads where I had to decide if I wanted to keep living the way I was. Jesus wasn’t just as my crossroads, but on the road leading to it. I only had to recognize that He was there.
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